I just had an incredible session with Moose. Like I said in the last post, I haven't been able to see him very often lately, so this was quite a pleasant surprise.
I decided to try to emphasize feel today, because I really want to have a light horse if I'm going to be doing liberty and higher level 3/4 things eventually. It turned out incredible. I rarely had to go to phase 3/4, but if I did, I was very clear about it, and then didn't need to again. Moose was really responding well to the lead rope. I tryed to be as subtle, but clear as possible, so his brain got involved. He had a great expression when we were done and was really LBI. I was really happy with our progress.
And it came to me today, hey, if you can ride your horse with just a string around his neck, why can't I play with my horse with just a string for a line, too? So, I think that's going to be something to aim for in the future. I want to see if I can play with my horse with just a binder twine around his neck, or something of that sort. Now that's a test of a light horse!
Besides, Moose was a lot happier today, too. I really felt like he was himself. And it was incredible how slowly we went! I really felt present with him, because I was trying so hard to go slow as to have hands that open quickly and close slowly, so I didn't want to miss his try. And he really hooked on to that.
Overall, a very neat day. I can see now why feel is so fascinating. Very cool.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Attempting to Fly While Stuck in the Mud
Well, I just had a very thought provoking conversation. Although I admit most all the thoughts were mine. And the conversation itself. And . . . well. . . the provoking part, too. (I amaze myself, lol). SOOO anyways I've been thinking some interesting stuff recently.
I haven't been able to play with the horses for the past 2 weeks, so it's given them some down time, and me too. I can only hope it's for the good, but I must say it's really causing me to learn a lot more. Even being outside with the horses just petting them usually teaches me something, usually some kind of theory, or a characteristic of one of the horses I hadn't known about before.
And so during this conversation today, I realized 3 things: 1) I am very bad at asking questions, 2) I over-analyze my horses WAY too much, and 3) I'm still waiting for an attitude change.
1) It kind of dawned on me just how bad at asking questions I am. For starters, I realized that I normally ask questions I think I already know the answers to (specifically pertaining to horses, though). Like when I'm unsure about something, but have an idea, I'll e-mail someone and ask them to tell me what they think. And then they'll usually regurgitate something like what I'm thinking, so I'll go "good, I was on the right track" and then go try it. But, see it seems like I can't do it all by myself. I need their go ahead. So, on my personality chart, you can definitely put a check mark in looks for reassurance.
But to exaggerate on that, it seems that I can't distinguish easily between when I need more knowledge and when I just need to go out and try something. Like I'll usually go look for more knowledge, when it's just a technique I'm lacking. Or I'll look for more information about reading horses when I've actually got a technique issue. It's all so confusing.
2) Now, I'm going to go about this in the most positive way I can, because I can see this post is turning into a "here's all my faults on a platter" so I'll try to be nice here. I also am still upset at my lack of progress. I won't deny that it gets hard for me to pretend to be satisfied with where I am when I am not. And part of the reason I seem to not make progress is because I can't tell when to ignore something, and when to pay attention to it. Like Moose throwing his head up when I try to halter. Predator inside me says to "ignore him, he'll let me halter him". And I usually always listen to that. But then I also say, "well, what if this is important, though, and I should wait to halter him?" Well, then I start second-guessing myself, and paying attention to it, and getting all bothered because I just spent a day "doing nothing" and nothing tangible came out of it.
3) I also found out another thing about myself, to elaborate on the knowledge vs technique issue. I used to think I was very resourceful, and I guess I still am, but I found out that I have the resources, but somehow not the tools. I mean, there's about a bazillion self-help articles out there, but there's only so many you can read. That's because it's not the article that changes you. It's what it does for you. And so I've probably read more of my fair share of natural horsemanship articles on line, always looking for another tip or bit of insight, but after a while it just becomes words on a page. None of these articles can do for me what I need right now. Not saying they're bad, but I think right now I am in a position where I need someone to sit me down and spell out what to do when, because I need an attitude change and a good mental slap in the face. Unfortunately, I feel like I've been here for a little over 6 months now to be perfectly honest. But I'm still waiting to make the change.
I want to be the horse's perfect partner in order to get him to be my perfect partner. And in order for that to change, I need help with patience, like these 2 famous quotes of Pat's say:
"Slow and right beats fast and wrong," and "Take the time it takes so it takes less time."
Well, it appears that I just can not seem to heed them. I want the end result very badly, but I'm dissatisfied with anything except progress. In other words, I want to go to heaven, but don't want to die. Can you see how frustrating this is? It's like being between a rock and a hard place. The only way out is to fly, but in order to do that first I've got to learn to use my wings. And I can't seem to get them working. I get stuck in self-doubt, low confidence, over-analyzing, confusion, mistrust, denial, all the normal bad things that assail someone when they're already unhappy. (love how life works, eh?)
So, I'm still not sure how to get out of this rut. I see many people using the Parelli program and getting absolutely fabulous results, and I long to be one of them. It's just that I'm still standing in my own way, and until I can get myself straight I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Hmm, maybe I'll go read some more articles. . . ;)
I haven't been able to play with the horses for the past 2 weeks, so it's given them some down time, and me too. I can only hope it's for the good, but I must say it's really causing me to learn a lot more. Even being outside with the horses just petting them usually teaches me something, usually some kind of theory, or a characteristic of one of the horses I hadn't known about before.
And so during this conversation today, I realized 3 things: 1) I am very bad at asking questions, 2) I over-analyze my horses WAY too much, and 3) I'm still waiting for an attitude change.
1) It kind of dawned on me just how bad at asking questions I am. For starters, I realized that I normally ask questions I think I already know the answers to (specifically pertaining to horses, though). Like when I'm unsure about something, but have an idea, I'll e-mail someone and ask them to tell me what they think. And then they'll usually regurgitate something like what I'm thinking, so I'll go "good, I was on the right track" and then go try it. But, see it seems like I can't do it all by myself. I need their go ahead. So, on my personality chart, you can definitely put a check mark in looks for reassurance.
But to exaggerate on that, it seems that I can't distinguish easily between when I need more knowledge and when I just need to go out and try something. Like I'll usually go look for more knowledge, when it's just a technique I'm lacking. Or I'll look for more information about reading horses when I've actually got a technique issue. It's all so confusing.
2) Now, I'm going to go about this in the most positive way I can, because I can see this post is turning into a "here's all my faults on a platter" so I'll try to be nice here. I also am still upset at my lack of progress. I won't deny that it gets hard for me to pretend to be satisfied with where I am when I am not. And part of the reason I seem to not make progress is because I can't tell when to ignore something, and when to pay attention to it. Like Moose throwing his head up when I try to halter. Predator inside me says to "ignore him, he'll let me halter him". And I usually always listen to that. But then I also say, "well, what if this is important, though, and I should wait to halter him?" Well, then I start second-guessing myself, and paying attention to it, and getting all bothered because I just spent a day "doing nothing" and nothing tangible came out of it.
3) I also found out another thing about myself, to elaborate on the knowledge vs technique issue. I used to think I was very resourceful, and I guess I still am, but I found out that I have the resources, but somehow not the tools. I mean, there's about a bazillion self-help articles out there, but there's only so many you can read. That's because it's not the article that changes you. It's what it does for you. And so I've probably read more of my fair share of natural horsemanship articles on line, always looking for another tip or bit of insight, but after a while it just becomes words on a page. None of these articles can do for me what I need right now. Not saying they're bad, but I think right now I am in a position where I need someone to sit me down and spell out what to do when, because I need an attitude change and a good mental slap in the face. Unfortunately, I feel like I've been here for a little over 6 months now to be perfectly honest. But I'm still waiting to make the change.
I want to be the horse's perfect partner in order to get him to be my perfect partner. And in order for that to change, I need help with patience, like these 2 famous quotes of Pat's say:
"Slow and right beats fast and wrong," and "Take the time it takes so it takes less time."
Well, it appears that I just can not seem to heed them. I want the end result very badly, but I'm dissatisfied with anything except progress. In other words, I want to go to heaven, but don't want to die. Can you see how frustrating this is? It's like being between a rock and a hard place. The only way out is to fly, but in order to do that first I've got to learn to use my wings. And I can't seem to get them working. I get stuck in self-doubt, low confidence, over-analyzing, confusion, mistrust, denial, all the normal bad things that assail someone when they're already unhappy. (love how life works, eh?)
So, I'm still not sure how to get out of this rut. I see many people using the Parelli program and getting absolutely fabulous results, and I long to be one of them. It's just that I'm still standing in my own way, and until I can get myself straight I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Hmm, maybe I'll go read some more articles. . . ;)
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Soul to Soul or Eye to Eye
I was watching a video done by Pat Parelli in 1987 the other day. For Savvy Club Members, you can find it on line. It's called California Expo 1987 Mar 06. It's a little hard to hear what Pat's saying, as a forewarning, but it's an incredible show of just how talented Pat is, and this is even 23 years ago!
But, the bad hearing turned out to be a blessing. It really made me pay attention to what Pat was doing more than what he was saying. So, I was absolutely astounded when the end result of what looked to be a few needless things turned out to be him riding the horse around bridleless. And what happens when things go bad (no spoilers here, watch it yourself). And the video's only about a half hour long, too. I was astounded.
So, while walking my dog I really thought with how in the world Pat was able to bring that change in that horse around so quickly. It looked like he was barely doing anything except yielding the horse's HQ. And I came across an interesting scenario.
While I was walking my dog Morrie there are some cows who just got brought in at a neighbor's house. I didn't know at the time, but my dog seems to just love them. I think he thinks they're just huge dogs or something, because he gets really excited whenever he sees them. And so I follow some of Cesar Millan's dog psychology, and like what he does, so I got to act as him for a little bit to keep Morrie under control. It didn't work. Well, I had an epiphany. The reason things didn't work with Morrie was because I was relying on my eyes. I couldn't feel his energy. So, I'd only discipline him whenever he looked excited, but I couldn't actually feel his energy. I still can't.
And I realized that I think that's a part of what I'm lacking with the horses. Now, I'm sure it takes a long time to develop this, and I also believe that this a part of what Tom Dorrance calls feel. I likened it to being on a soul to soul level, instead of just eye to eye. Because with horses, and with Morrie, I look at what they're doing, but I can't really feel it like Pat or Cesar can. Not that I expect to, but it was a very interesting realization. Partially, because it really gave me a deeper respect for people who are good with horses (and Cesar, too), but also because I can really see how this would transmit to horses.
If you could just feel their energy, and what state they're in at that time, you would do the right thing. It's exactly like one of my favorite quotes from Linda Parelli: "If you can read the horse, you'd know what to do." And so I realized one of the reasons I can't read horses very well yet is because I can't feel of them yet, and if I can't do that there's no way we can feel together, and eventually get them to feel for me.
But, the bad hearing turned out to be a blessing. It really made me pay attention to what Pat was doing more than what he was saying. So, I was absolutely astounded when the end result of what looked to be a few needless things turned out to be him riding the horse around bridleless. And what happens when things go bad (no spoilers here, watch it yourself). And the video's only about a half hour long, too. I was astounded.
So, while walking my dog I really thought with how in the world Pat was able to bring that change in that horse around so quickly. It looked like he was barely doing anything except yielding the horse's HQ. And I came across an interesting scenario.
While I was walking my dog Morrie there are some cows who just got brought in at a neighbor's house. I didn't know at the time, but my dog seems to just love them. I think he thinks they're just huge dogs or something, because he gets really excited whenever he sees them. And so I follow some of Cesar Millan's dog psychology, and like what he does, so I got to act as him for a little bit to keep Morrie under control. It didn't work. Well, I had an epiphany. The reason things didn't work with Morrie was because I was relying on my eyes. I couldn't feel his energy. So, I'd only discipline him whenever he looked excited, but I couldn't actually feel his energy. I still can't.
And I realized that I think that's a part of what I'm lacking with the horses. Now, I'm sure it takes a long time to develop this, and I also believe that this a part of what Tom Dorrance calls feel. I likened it to being on a soul to soul level, instead of just eye to eye. Because with horses, and with Morrie, I look at what they're doing, but I can't really feel it like Pat or Cesar can. Not that I expect to, but it was a very interesting realization. Partially, because it really gave me a deeper respect for people who are good with horses (and Cesar, too), but also because I can really see how this would transmit to horses.
If you could just feel their energy, and what state they're in at that time, you would do the right thing. It's exactly like one of my favorite quotes from Linda Parelli: "If you can read the horse, you'd know what to do." And so I realized one of the reasons I can't read horses very well yet is because I can't feel of them yet, and if I can't do that there's no way we can feel together, and eventually get them to feel for me.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Quality Not Quanity
That's the main theme of what I learned today. It's not the amount of time that counts, but rather what you make of it. I didn't even go play with the ponies today, I just did my horsey chores quite slowly, and I still learned a few interesting things.
- This one doesn't quite qualify, since I learned this on my walk today, but I realized more about myself. I found out a few years ago that I naturally have very tense shoulders. Now and then I make an effort to relax them, but I don't think it has done very much. Well, today I found out that my coat might actually be contributing to the tension! See, my coat is long enough that I can get away with not wearing gloves in the winter, because I just pull the sleeves down and tuck my hands inside them. And I noticed when I experimented with it today that that pulls my shoulders up. How interesting!
- In reading Carolyn Resnick's book, she mentions at one point that she has discovered that in herds of horses, the dominant horse is behind the other horses, so he can drive them. I found this concept a bit strange, because I would think the alpha would be in front leading the herd, instead of driving them from behind. But then, when I saw Moose drive Bella forward, it clicked. And I even made a connection. You know when you're on the highway driving, and someone tailgates you? They're driving you. Unfortunately, for us humans it does little more than cause opposition reflex, but still quite a good example.
- Just an idea here, but I was thinking about a few posts I read on the SC forum a while back, and some of the horse ads I see on craigslist. It's considered a good attribute for a horse to have if they can not be ridden for a while, and then just thrown a saddle on and go. While that seems unfair in my eyes, I was thinking about the horses that can't do that. So, I came to the conclusion that if you play with your horse regularly, and then give him a vacation for a while, and then you pick up playing and your horse is unconfident, your horse is probably innately Right Brain (unless he's having an off day, like its windy). If he is Left Brain, he's probably innately Left Brain, or he's just a Right Brain horse who has gained confidence and digested what you taught him over the break.
- Controlling an extrovert's feet controls their emotions. It's been really icy here for the past few weeks and it's been interesting to watch Bella's transition to the ice. Moose has no problem, but Bella, being the subordinate, is really learning how to keep her emotions in check more. So, she is learning to walk calmly, because she physically can't trot or canter without slipping.
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