Life Goes On

First of all, I thought I'd re-do our ponies' horsenalities, so you can see where they're at.



[caption id="attachment_636" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Although it may not look like it from this chart, I've been thinking lately that Bella is innately LBI."][/caption]

And on that note, we are now one pony short. After around 10 years of boarding at our house, Dancer is no longer with us. Don't worry, she's alive! Her owner always wanted to have Dancer at her house, and her dream finally became a reality this year. I'm sad to see her go, but I'm happy for her owner! :)

Honey, I need you to do this

My lesson with Shirley on Wednesday went great! I learned SOO much, it was completely worth it.

Anyways, my lesson was the first one (of 3 total). I decided that I wanted to work on our Circling Game, because Moose can't even make it around half a lap at the WALK before calling it quits. So, Shirley had me show her our HQ driving game first off. I moved his HQ around, and it moved fine, but she pointed out that his feet don't cross over like they should. So, our goal was to get him to cross over 3x in a row. He would do 2x just fine, but he'd cheat on the 3rd, so we ended up going round and round and round for whoever knows how many circles. We did it from both sides, so I'm sure Moose was dizzy by the time we were done.

Afterwards, I showed her our circles. And interestingly enough, Moose took off like a shot when I sent him the first time (he isn't used to having so particular of a leader, so I think it was too much pressure for him), and ran around like a nut  for a little while. (I don't remember the exact order of things after this, just an fyi). I also wanted to play with having Moose jump some barrels, because I could never get him to jump anything. So, while he's running around and not really thinking, he eventually encounters the barrels. At first, he'd swerve around them, then he'd jump them unconfidently, then he'd stop in front of them and ask me a question, so it was a process.

Shirley played with him for a little bit when he was in this  mode (it's not RBE like "I'm gonna die!!", it's more like "can't think, gotta move!"), but I ran in to get some fly spray at that time. When I saw him again, she was playing with yielding his hindquarters.

Then, we did sideways. I'm just starting sideways, so he did pretty well. Then, I showed her my squeeze and we combined the two. I did sideways, and then backed up and did squeeze. Once I got the feel down, Moose did really well. Shirley commented that this exercise is great for horses to learn where their feet are, and to be a little more nimble. I could see his progress, too, because when we started with the HQ driving game, he kept tripping on himself.

Now, I think we did our circling game again along with jumping the barrels. He was circling at the trot without breaking gait, and even jumping the barrels without hesitation! It was wonderful. And he was pulling on me less than the first time, too.

Then, we did Stick to Me, and once Shirley had him go between me and our round pen fence, it got WAY better. He understood to go when I go, and stop when I stop. It was so cool to see him mirror me like that!

And I was pretty surprised by this, but Shirley told me that Moose is not an RBI. She thinks he's actually an LBI, just a pretty mild one. She said half-way through my lesson that she hadn't seen him go Right Brain once during this whole thing! So, I guess I do have to more forward more. I was always going slow for him, because I wante to keep his confidence.

Here's what I learned:

• The title was the theme of all the lessons today


• It's okay to have expectations for Moose


• I need to be a better leader and get Moose through his can't think phase, instead of avoiding it


• Every horse needs a leader, even the self-confident/dominant ones


• It's not rocket science!


• Your horse will show the same amount of enthusiasm that you put in.

Afterwards, 2 other friends had their lessons. Dancer's owner Lisa went first and it was nice to see what Shirley had them do. They started out with Circling Game, too, and then spent the remainder of their time working on Sideways game. Dancer is very dominant, and Shirley had Lisa assert her leadership, but it was a gradual thing versus just fight through it. So, from that session I learned that passive persistence pays off and the importance of defending your space.

Then, another friend named Lisa had a lesson. But in this one, Shirley played with the horse the whole time, but that's because the horse was an untrained 2 year old. The theme of this lesson was that you can't keep babying these horses (see link). Yes, they're untrained. Yes, some of them are untouched. But you have to move past that and treat them like normal horses. Of course, you have to be cautious, but you still have to act like the calm, confident, competent leader that they need.

And a friend took some pictures of Moose and I, so they will be added to this post as soon as I get them!

Fighting Words

Based on my realizations I had with Dancer which I mentioned last post, I tried playing with her today. I have to say that I did do better than previous times playing with her, but she still doesn't like being around me.

But yeah, the positive part of our playtime yesterday was  that I had more awareness of what I was doing than before. This time, if I fought with her, it was because I chose to, not because I thought that was the only option. But her behavior still has me confused! Whenever I put her online, she goes into this mode which could best be described as Nervous Dominance. That's the best way I can put it, because I'm not exactly sure. It's like she's half RB and half LB. She gets nervous, so she doesn't think. For instance, I'll ask her to put her nose on a cone and she will, but she then proceeds to paw the cone apart, and then tries to step on it and walk over it (it's a big cone, by the way). But she's not thinking: the whole time she doesn't think about it, she just does it. But after she destroys the cone, let's say I let her come in. She always pokes her nose at me 2+ times coming in, and then comes in VERY close with ears back a little. (I've tried having her stay away from me a little bit, but it just ends up in another fight, so I decided no to go there today.)

But another thing that is bad is leading. I would say that I hardly feel safe leading her at anything more than a slow walk. Reason being that she leads very close to me. Maybe she was taught this way, I'm not sure, but it makes me feel pretty unsafe. Say Dancer is on my right and I'm leading her. Well, her head would be by my right shoulder, but her body is behind me. Basically, she's in the position where if anything happens, I'm going to get ran over by her shoulder. Make sense? I remember Pat talking about it at the Madison Tour Stop last year with the demo horse.

Honestly, I feel more like a lion-tamer or snake handler than a Parelli student when I'm with her. Plus, she hates me and I don't feel safe around her. Not a good match.

Oh, and I noticed something about her attitude yesterday, too. She says "NO!" to everything! But at least this one doesn't apply for only me. She does this with the other horses, too. For example, Moose will pin his ears at her to move out of the way, and she swishes her tail and kind of saunters away. Then, he'll charge at her, and she moves out at a trot with an angry "Fine" attitude. She reminds me of a crabby old lady. :)

Lastly, I tried giving her treats when she got aggressive. Don't think I did it right. She stopped being aggressive, but then crowded me. So, I asked her to get out of my space, and she got mad again. Am I supposed to give her treats every time she gets mad? Because if so, I don't think I'm going to have enough treats. She gets mad at everything, like I said in last paragraph.

P.S. I'm not trying to criticize Dancer here. That is not my intention. I just want to document my issues with/feelings about her, because then I can see how things have changed when I gain more savvy and she likes me. Which is definitely something to look forward to!

There Is Hope For Us Yet

I haven't updated on the ponies for a while, so I thought I'd let everyone know about their progress recently. Today in particular went pretty well.

As background knowledge, Moose can't/won't (I'm not sure which one) stand near me at liberty while I pet him. And Dancer has become hard to catch again. But of course, I'm sure that's not anything new.

Sooo. . . .

Moose let himself be petted with no line on!! And while someone could totally ruin this moment by saying that I had treats, he still did it!! So, that made me really happy. And with that, he would've let me put the halter on him, too, had I decided to progress further.

Okay, but now this one is a shocker. Dancer actually greeted me at the gate today. I know, amazing right!? But here, let me just describe the magnitude of this for you. We have 3ish acres of pasture at our house. And she came all the way over from the other side of the pasture!!

[caption id="attachment_368" align="aligncenter" width="499" caption="Click on picture for a larger view"][/caption]

Needless to say, that made my day. But wait, it gets better. She even walked inside the stall! (background knowledge: Dancer has not been inside the stalls ever since Bella came here, because she she got trapped inside a few times). And when I went into the pasture, she didn't leave! She actually stood there and let me pet her!

"How interesting!"

Now for a little lecture, oh the horror. Okay, so I just saw the 6th DVD of L&HB yesterday. The 6th DVD wasn't real long, but I learned an interesting tidbit of information. Linda phrased it better, but basically there are 2 kinds of fear in horses: fear of death, and fear of a loss of dignity or spirit. Horses who have a fear of death are usually the RB kind, and are looking to be safe. Horses who are afraid of a loss of dignity/spirit are usually LB and are dominant.

Reflecting on that, Dancer is not afraid of dying. She is definitely a a more LB type. So, that means Dancer would most likely have the fear of a loss of dignity or spirit. So, maybe that's why Dancer doesn't (I'd say didn't, but I'm being realistic here) like me. Somehow, I am bringing up this fear in her. Hmm. . .

This made me decide to really try to get her rapport. Before, I had an oookay rapport and focused on respect to such a degree that I lost all of the rapport. So, this time I'm trying to do things different. But it's still interesting that even when I'm being nice, she's still dominant. For instance, I'll give her a treat and then she will perk up and barge right into my personal space. So, I wave my arms, like "Sorry, honey you're too close!" Then, her ears go back immediately and she just gets angry. I'm realizing that I have to be a better leader, but how can I do that without losing her rapport or causing her to be fearful?

Ah, well. "Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still." There's my motto for today, lol!